On the 10th day of counting down...

10 days until Christmas!


Our french Christmas play was today. It went off without a hitch. I was a homeless man, and might I say, I think I did a damn good job.


That was my mood 6 hours ago. I'm really sad now.
I really really really really miss Steve.
He's in Connetcicut (which I cannot spell off the top of my head) and he needed me to edit an amazing paper he wrote and I only had the chance to talk to him for about fifteen minutes as apposed to our usual five hours on weekends and hour and a half on week days. So I'm now sitting here, lazily, if that's a word, on my bum, in front of a screen, being sad/tired/lonely.

I am Steve-less for about two months.

He really wants to get me a Christmas present, but I really don't think he needs to. But he honestly like really does. I think it's going to kill him if he doesn't. :P I love my friendship with him. It's never been so hard for me to be apart with someone for only about five days. I've just decided that I'm going to make him a giant card for when he gets back. A nice red one. Why do I feel the need to tell you this? This I am unsure...

:D

I hope you don't mind I ramble.

Steve doesn't read my blog.



I've gone loco.



I need a Vlog



Yes, I meant to put the V there, meaning "Video Blog ♪"



The V and B key are right next to each other..


<3

I'm still alive :D

It's been four days since I've had my teeth out. It's not as bad as I thought it was going to be. The first day is hell. You have no idea what's going on. When I woke up after, I had no idea where I was. I could my sister's surgery going on though, let's just say I heard drills. DRILLS. I woke up during the actual surgery, scariest moment of my life. I kept saying ow, but I was numbed, so it felt like being scraped at inside my mouth. I think they gave me more drugs though, because I was out after about five seconds. Just lots of blood, and chomping on gauze when I got home. It's pretty narsty.
My cheeks are huge. I feel so ugly and like a fattie. Seriously, my face makes me look like I put on sixty-five pounds. Yet, I've lost five. It's liquid food for three days. Trust me, you'll never want solid food so much in your life. Food will feel like an enemy the day of surgery. Jell-O has become a must for survival in these past days, and oddly enough, I wanted pasta more than I ever have in life. I even sound like a fattie. (;
Anyways,
Day 1. Surgery. Hell and extreme fatigue. VERY NUMB. You're also really high on whatever they gave me, and you don't want to talk. Lots of blood, and make sure you have lots of gauze.
Day 2. Barely remembers the day before. Swelling starts. Lots of boredom, make sure you have good movies, or a Gamboy handy. You'll start eating, but you know it's because you have to. You can't feel your lips, so eat sitting upright.
Day 3. Chimunk face starts. Yesterday, the thing I wanted more than ever was visits. My cousin came to see me and she brought Jill and I flowers <3 You can start to talk more, and you'll want to.
Today, Day 4. It's pretty good today. My cheeks are huge, and again, I feel really ugly. I don't want to go to school tomorrow, yet I do to go see everyone. My jaw hurts a bit, it just feels like a headache.
So this is the summary of my four days after wisdom teeth surgery.

I miss all of you, and I'm glad I get to see you all tomorrow.

Thank-you for MSN and Blogger

Dental surgery is tomorrow. And it's just hit me.
I'm not worried, surprisingly. This sort of snuck up on me, I never thought it would come. We've moved the dates around enough times that I thought it would just slip away.
So as some of you may know, I have 7 wisdom teeth. Yes, 7. (DearLordy! There is someone at my door!) I'm so chicken. Anyways, I have to go and get 6 of these 7 shark knives out of my mouth. One is too high up and it can't be removed yet or it might break my face. XD Surgery is tomorrow at 11am, and I can't eat anything starting 3am tomorrow.
Anyways, I'm pretty sure I have the greatest friends in the world. They're all really caring and worried, even though they shouldn't be. I love them forever. I'll hopefully be back at school by Tuesday at the most. I want all of you to know Imma miss you tonnnss and I can't wait until I get to come back and see you all! Unfortuneately, my best best best friend Steve is going to move to Conneticit after grad! And he's going to gone for the rest of Decemeber, and some of January! This really sucks! He's leaving next week, and I'm not going to be there tomorrow and Friday. ): I'm going to miss him tremendously. I love him to death, and I can't imagine how different this year would be if I didn't take the time to get to know him. I will deff. go visit him when he's gone, and I know he's deff. going to come visit. <3>

BIG NEWS

You'll be happy to hear that my Internet is now up and running at home. I can now keep you informed on the wonderful journey of aches and how it feels to have 6 teeth removed out of your mouth.




So anyways, apparently my last post offended some people. I didn't have that intention when I was writing it, and I'm sorry if it struck you that way. I don't think there was anything wrong with it, and I really don't see that I wrote anything rude or mean.



And to YOU (I think she knows who she is) I'm really really really sorry. I hope you're not mad at me, and I never meant to screw things up. I love you to death, and we really shouldn't let him get in between our friendship.

And YOU (I think he knows who he is) I don't feel like I should be the one to apologize, but I am really sorry for screwing this up. I'm sorry I feel the way I do, and I'm sorry you'll never understand. The only thing I really want from you is an apology, and maybe things may get back to normal. I still really want and would love to still stay friends.

I thought you should be informed,

My Internet isn't working at home, and I'm getting my teeth out on THURSDAY. Hopefully, it'll be running by then, so you'll be able to share my pain.


-Later, Gaterr.

-Brooke.

You know who you are...

I'm sorry if I've ever offended you. I can't help the way I feel about you, and I don' think you understand how much you mean to me. I never meant to hurt you, and now neither of you are happy. I want you both to know that I'm really sorry. I didn't want to stand in the way, and you shouldn't of let me. I know how much you both mean to each other, and I wish you both the best. I'm sorry I let you both down, and I hope you'll forgive me for being jealous.

If I you ever want to me to know something, please tell me. I hope this won't happen again. Can we all stay friends, please?

Taylor Swift sings about my life.

It's funny. Just when you think you have a hold of someone, it's gone. And then a best friend tells you something you don't want to believe.
I always fall hard. But I always fall for the ones that will never feel the same. I don't know if I'm too good of friends with someone, or they just think, God, no. I'm pretty sure it's the second one.
I'm head over heels for this guy. I know he'll never feel the same way. It's good that we're good friends, but loving him is killing me. I want to get over him so bad, but I can't. Forcing myself hasn't been working; it just reminds me he'll never feel the same way. I haven't felt this way for someone since, well, that's a different story. A friend suggested that I should try blocking him out for a while. Not speaking to him, not hanging around him, not even looking at him. This sounds kind of... hard for me to do.
As for the best friend thing, she likes him too. Worse, she already has a boyfriend. The worst thing though, is this guy likes her too. And he's already gotten upset because she told him that she can't like him because it's hurting too many people, including herself. I don't want to be selfish, so I told her to go for it. (He just signed in MSN...) She still loves her boyfriend, but I'm worried because she sees him everyday. And she hasn't seen her boyfriend since Halloween... You can see why I'm worried. I know if I were her, I would be in the exact same position. But I don't want her to miss out on him, he's a great guy. Just sometimes a little different. But who isn't.
I hope he reliezes sometime that I've always been there. Liking him for him, listening to him talk about important things to me.
As in the words of Taylor Swift:

If you could see that I'm the one who understands you
Been here all along so why can't you see
You belong with me